Beyond Babedom

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My Dirty Little Secrets

We all have them. Little secrets that we try so hard to hide. Now I’m coming out of the closet, so to speak, and sharing mine. Okay, not all of my secrets; I’m not crazy. But enough to maybe get you to share yours, too.

  • The 5 Second Rule: Yes, I will pick up food from the floor and eat it. Get over it. I know you do, too. Admit it –  especially if it’s something you really, really love and you’re down to the last morsel. Like you’re going to throw away that mini Mounds bar just because you were clumsy?
  • Multitasking: You know when we’re talking on the phone and I seem kind of distant? Here’s my confession: I’m checking email, surfing the web, or paying my bills online. I know it’s rude, I know I shouldn’t. But I’m just not able to stop. And, no, I’m not on the phone right now. Really, Camille.
  • Guilty Pleasures: No, I don’t watch Survivor, The Biggest Loser or America’s Top Model. In fact, I really don’t watch reality TV, except for American Idol. But I do occasionally watch some of the stupidest television imaginable, so stupid, in fact, that I can’t even name one show off the top of my head. But, trust me, they are really stupid: sitcoms, fashion, you name it. Why? Mostly it’s because I watch while I do things in the kitchen, where I don’t have Tivo, but that’s just an excuse.
  • Selfishness: Ever since Gary became a vegan, I don’t have to feel bad about eating all the brie. But what about when I take the last packet of Splenda, knowing full well that he’ll have to make the trek to the basement to replenish? Wait a minute: why should I feel guilty? I’m the one putting the toilet paper roll on! Forget this one – let him get the friggin’ Splenda!
  • Undercover: Now these will start to get a little more personal, so be prepared. Sometimes – not often, but sometimes – I wear the same pair of underpants two days in a row. Why? Occasionally because I don’t have any clean ones, but mostly because of pure laziness. Which leads me to my next revelation. . . .
  • I don’t wash my hair daily: It doesn’t need it! And it gets really dried out if I do. Now, I’ve read that if you do wash your hair every day, you cause more oils to be produced making it necessary to wash it every day. So, I don’t. That’s not why I don’t, but that doesn’t really matter, does it?
  • Golden Showers: I scared you with this one, right? No, it doesn’t mean I like golden showers (Yuck. If that’s your secret, please don’t share); it just means I just don’t shower every day. Why not? Because I don’t want to waste water, because I’m just not that dirty, because I don’t want flaky skin, because I don’t have time. Whatever. I just don’t. But I’ll bet I’m not the only one who doesn’t.

So, now you know. Most of my dirty little secrets. But do you have to courage to share yours?

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009 at 7:18 PM and is filed under Grooming. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  1. Andrea Lyon says:

    well that might have been more than I wanted to know Lucille. I don’t wash my hair every day either, but I can’t imagine no shower…
    However, I do daydream while driving. I can concentrate, but I like to jsut think about things — movies or whatever, and sometimes I am home without remembering driving there.

  2. Camille says:

    Yuck and Yuck. There are some things one should keep to oneself…TMI!

  3. Terri says:

    I don’t shower or wash my hair every day either. I work from home, so sometimes I don’t even get out of my PJs. How do I get dirty if I don’t do anything except sit at the computer all day? It’s a waste of water. I do watch The Biggest Loser, but I don’t really watch any other reality TV, except American Idol, but I didn’t watch it last year. I probably know the names of more characters on the Disney Channel and Nickelodeon than I do on the major networks. I know the words to some of Hannah Montana and the Jonas Brothers (AKA JoBros) songs because it’s on the TV constantly in my house. I remember when it was the Wiggles songs that I knew. Hot Potato, hot potato . . . LOL

  4. David Alexander says:

    5-second rule, absolutely, in fact depending on the type of food, I’ll go 10 seconds.

    I plead guilty to the phone situation. I load laundry, pick up the kids clothes, play poker on the computer, clean the litter box…

    Guilty pleasures on television: Married with Children, The Jeffersons, Good Times(Dynomite!!!) — there, I said it!

    The underwear thing: Please, guys go two days or more all the time! Same with showers (the hair thing is not a high priority anymore)

    There are other secrets, of course. But I’m not sharing them with this crowd!

  5. Judy Herring says:

    Yes, I have secrets..but I will only share one or two..some secrets MUST remain secrets! I am not the neatest person in the bedroom…I will let clothes pile up in the corner,they’re clean, just not put away. Also, if I’m expecting guests at the last minute..I throw everything in the hall closet or spare bedroom and hope and pray the doors stay shut! This one really made me think about things..nice one Lucille!

  6. Lucille says:

    One of my (to remain nameless) contributors admitted she occasionally spends a day in her PJs, never bothering to dress or, as no surprise to me, change her undies.

    Indeed, I am going to venture to guess that more than one of you that ughed or tsked at my confession have done the same. Fess up, if you have the balls – even if you do it anonymously.

  7. Hazel says:

    5-second rule: I only give it 3 seconds. Don’t want my food to get cold lying on the floor. I am also guilty of hanging around all day in pj’s (love it). I don’t worry about wearing my panties more than one day because, depending on what I’m wearing, I don’t wear any (hate panty lines).Right, like all you ladies wear panties with everything. Anyway, just love the dirty little secrets.

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