Beyond Babedom

We're (way) over 40. Deal with it.

The Little Wave

Why is it so hard for someĀ  people to give the little wave? I mean, if I’m willing to let you in, at the very least, give me the little wave. I always get one from women over 40. But 20 somethings? It always amazes me how many of them simply ignore you when you’re nice enough to let them merge or pull out or cut in front of you. What does that say? That they don’t appreciate your civility? That they can’t be bothered? Or is it simply that they are just unaware of normal, polite behavior? (I notice they have no problem with the one-finger wave)

I’m inclined to believe it’s just a case of poor upbringing. And I hate to sound like an old fogy, but didn’t these people ever learn any manners? I’ve been noticing how the things that we’ve all taken for granted (please, thank you, etc.) don’t seem to be taught to kids anymore. And table manners? Please. Yes, it’s fine to eat french fries with your hands, but a steak? I’m not exaggerating; no names here, but I’ve seen 20-somethings actually cutting up a steak and picking up the pieces with their fingers . . . at the holiday dinner table. Nice.

But that’s just indicative of the way communication and socialization has changed. I have no problem with texting and FaceBook. But now that’s the only way that lots of parents ever communicate with their kids. How much can you teach them about life if you have to punch it on a tiny keyboard?

No one seems to have family dinners anymore, so bye bye to nightly talks with your kids about what’s going on in school. Forget about sitting around the TV together, discussing decisions the characters are making on your favorite shows. Can you even picture kids watching TV with their parents anymore? They each have their own set, in their own room (don’t even get me started on sharing a room with 3 sisters. . . )

Even commercials have more sway then when we were kids – at least then, your parents could tell you how their advertising claims were pure BS (even if you chose not to believe Mom and Dad). I didn’t always (never) agree with my father. But our disagreements over what we saw on the news led me to engage in some real, critical thinking. How much of that do you see happening now? The most critical thought they have is probably “Is Bruno Mars really better than Justin Bieber?”

But, getting back to manners. And civility. And the little thank you wave. Come on, folks. Don’t make me cry.

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 5th, 2011 at 12:07 PM and is filed under Socializing. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  1. David says:

    A large part of it is practicing manners every day. I’m hammering on my kids all the time to practice their manners. I can think of a number of occasions where wait staff have been amazed that 13-year old kids take the time to say “Please” and “Thank you.”

    Most people are so consumed with their own lives, and living exclusively in their own heads, that they don’t take the time to practice basic respect for others. When I hold the door for folks and they don’t respond, I say out loud “You’re Welcome” or “Oh no, excuse me!” You’d be surprised how often that gets a reaction.

  2. Joann says:

    The way I see it Lucille, is that manners are not inforced because no one is around to teach the kids since both parents are working and there is not much time for the family to sit and eat dinner together let alone spend quality time together. As for the waving the finger…I noticed that all the time in New Jersey….I was born and raised in that state and could not wait to leave. Everyone is in a hurry to get nowhere important…though they think it is important. Did we use manners on the road and in the home when we were that age????? Maybe we did but I am sure at times we did not, especially right after having a fight with your boyfriend or an argument with the parents, but at least we had dinner on the table waiting for us and the fast food thing was not an everyday thing as now.

    Video games have consumed the minds of our children and also has become a part time baby sitter for some. I really do not think they are playing “Be Polite and Watch Your Manners” on those game systems…There ya go a new video game with education attached without bloodshed.

    Or maybe we are just expecting too much from others..What goes around comes around and one day those will be complaining of the same or even more….

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