Gossip Boy
Gossip, gossip, gossip. It’s what girls do, right? Wrong. Just like the inaccurate “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,” (remember which gender usually says “If I can’t have her, nobody will”), there is the equally inaccurate “gossip like an old lady”. Who gossips more than anyone? Men do. But they call it “sports talk”.
If you’re going to a Super Bowl party today, keep track of how many times the guys say something about the players. Is Eli Manning an “elite” quarterback? Can Tom Brady handle New York’s defensive line? Is Manning tough enough? Who has the better statistics? Did Tom Brady really “guarantee” victory? Geez!
Hey, I didn’t make these up. Just do a little web search or turn on sports radio. . . if you can stand it for more than 3 minutes.
Yes, you don’t have to listen to your guy and his buddies gossip about the players; you can simply listen to the game’s commentators if you can’t stomach ESPN radio (which, to me, is tantamount to torture). Their conversations are no less inane than what you’ll hear on Entertainment Nightly (if, in fact, that’s still what it’s called. I personally don’t indulge). The back and forth between Pat Summerall & John Madden may be called “analysis,” but I call it good old gossip.
Take a peak on any sports site and read that “Stephen Ross is “infatuated” with idea of signing Peyton Manning” or Tiquan Underwood takes his release well and then tell me that’s not gossip. Sure, it’s all wound around the statistics and observations and “news” but how is that different from talking about who gained more weight among your friends or how many times Barbara wore the same outfit or the news that your sister is getting a divorce? Our gossip is more personal, maybe because we’re better equipped to talk about personal relationships. But for guys, these athletes are the people they do have relationships with, on a very intimate level. Yes, intimate. Who else do they lay in bed thinking about, other than you?
My absolute favorite discovery is the app called ReSporter. They describe it as an app that “shows users what their American football heroes are saying NOW on social media. Perfect for the up and coming Super Bowl.” I am not making this up; check it out for yourself if you don’t believe me.
All that said, go ahead and gossip away, boys. Why not? Just remember this:
While gossip among women is universally ridiculed as low and trivial, gossip among men, especially if it is about women, is called theory, or idea, or fact.
– Andrea Dworkin
Tags: men and sports, men over 40, Sports, sports commentators, sports radio, Super Bowl, why do men talk sports, women over 40
In the distant past, long ago men would discuss the most effective way to slay the Mammoth with one and other while the women grubbed for roots, and picked berries when not nursing the brats. Courage and cunning were the hallmarks of the male in the hunt; patience, persistence and passive gratitude for the meat were the hallmarks of the fairer sex. Now, the Mammoth hunter teaches Home Ec, while the gatherer is a firefighter. It’s unnatural. So, give that vanishing breed, the male this last refuge, football, and get back in the kitchen to whip up that Bacon, Velveeta, jalapeno, bean dip, and give us this one day of the year when we can get in touch with our roots.